


Pain Killers

by Frostberry



Category: Naruto
Genre: M/M, Self Harm, gets pretty fucked up yeah, hospital drama and shit, hurr durr husbands, its based off a black mirror episode, really fucked up, set in the future or some shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-01
Updated: 2019-08-01
Packaged: 2020-07-28 14:01:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20065198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frostberry/pseuds/Frostberry
Summary: Kakuzu watches as his husband Hidan goes from being a loyal follower of Jesus to an empty shell only wanting pain, pleasure and death.





	Pain Killers

“Doctor, can I have a word?” 

Kakuzu looked up from his cheap lettuce and egg (with no mayo) sandwich and glared. He didn’t like to be disturbed on his fifteen minute break, especially by strangers wearing suits. 

“You look like you’re selling insurance,” said Kakuzu, biting into the tasteless sandwich. “Leave me alone.” 

The man did the exact opposite of that. Instead of going away, he sat down in front of Kakuzu. They were in the hospital cafeteria, and it was four thirty in the morning. Kakuzu had an overnight shift, and had already been spat on three times and vomited on once, mostly by drug overdosers. He was not in the mood to be talking to anyone. Even more so, he had forgotten his food from home and had to buy from the vending machine. 

The man smiled and got out a briefcase. “I’m Katasuke Tono, from Yamanaka Technologies.” 

Kakuzu didn’t reply. 

The unwelcome visitor however, did not leave. “Yamanaka Technologies, as you should be aware, have been dealing with the mind, and cameras and-” 

“I know who Yamanaka Technologies are, they are literally across the road from this hospital. We buy our keyhole cameras from them.” 

“Okay…” Katasuke put his brochure back in his briefcase. “I’m head of newest additions, and we have something that we are hoping to trial here which could potentially raise your mortality rates up and over one hundred percent.” 

Kakuzu gave up, knowing that the man would never leave. He scrunched up the sandwich wrapper and threw in the bin next to him. “...Go on.” He said, sighing. 

“Behold!” Katasuke announced, bringing out an ipad, two virtual reality templesets and some sort of weird looking hair net thing. He tapped the iPad a few times, and a hologram of two mice appeared.    
“As you know, Yamanaka Technologies main focus is all about the mind and its footage. We can see images from the mind. We can see everything from cameras. And so we decided to combine the two; and try and put animal’s consciousness into other animals. This is Mouse A and Mouse B,” He pointed at them, as if Kakuzu wasn’t smart enough to figure out which was which. “We decided to try and get Mouse B’s consciousness to be transferred into Mouse A’s. So we blindfolded Mouse B to see if he would run around while Mouse A was in a little hamster wheel. You know - show us any proof Mouse B’s consciousness was fully uploaded into Mouse A. It didn’t work.” 

“So why are you telling me this?” 

“One of our colleagues dropped coffee on Mouse A when he was taking him out of the cage. Mouse B suddenly started going crazy - so what I’m saying his -” Katasuke tapped on the words which read  _ Mouse B  _ \- “We didn’t transfer consciousness. We transferred  _ physical sensations  _ to Mouse B from Mouse A… it was an astonishing discovery. And we decided to make a prototype to present to this hospital for a human trial.”    
“So what do you do?” Kakuzu was  _ slightly  _ more interested now. He even forgot to sip his coffee. “How does it work?” 

Katasuke handed the two templesets to Kakuzu. “Two normal Virtual Reality headsets that have shrunk and remodelled into a small size - this one here -” he pointed at the triangle, “Goes on the left temple. This one here-” He then pointed at the circle one, “Goes on the neck. We call it the Jashin Pendant, as they are chained together from the inside underneath the skin, from the frontal lobes all the way down to the cerebellum. Then this hairnet are the wires that are connected to the patient. It looks weird doesn’t it? Just think about it. If someone is having a seizure, but you aren’t sure - you will be able to figure it out by knowing what they are feeling. They may be exhibiting signs of drunkenness, or something else. You will be able to figure it out. It will save time diagnosing, and it will free up hospital beds quickly. I heard this hospital doesn’t have the…  _ best  _ reputation, Doctor Kakuzu. It will save money and bring this hospital up to world standards. What do you think?” 

Kakuzu looked up. It was a good idea. 

“Do you want to get the implant tomorrow, or…?” 

“What?” said Kakuzu. “I am not getting that thing in my head.” 

Katasuke looked slightly disappointed. “Okay… I may have to ask another-” 

“However, I do have someone in mind who might take up on your offer.” 

***

Kakuzu could hear the drill in the background as Hidan picked up his call. “What do you want?” 

“Why are you fixing my chair at four thirty in the morning? I asked you to do it last night.” 

“Pfft, like I give a fuck about our neighbours,” Hidan replied, and there was a bang on the floor as he put the drill down. “My shift isn’t until six so I better make the most of the time I have before my husband gets home.” 

Kakuzu rolled his eyes. He didn’t like being referred to as ‘husband’ or ‘partner’ or whatever. It had been five years with Hidan, and three years married. “Not going to church first?” 

“I am,” Hidan replied. “Hospital chapel.” Being a man of Jesus, Hidan only took religion and his work seriously. “Okay. I’m serious - why have you rang me?” 

Kakuzu explained Katasuke’s prototype to him. “Cool,” he replied. “Sounds good. I’ll do it.” 

“Come in early and you’ll meet Katasuke.” 

***

Hidan turned up thirty minutes later at the hospital, already in his dark blue nurse’s uniform and his gym bag of fresh clothes on his shoulder. His large cross tattoo stood out of his neck, and his arms were literally covered in bible quotes. His favourite, _If there is a man who lies with a male as those who lie with a woman, both of them have committed a detestable act. –Leviticus 20:13, _etched into his hand as a sign of his former homophobia and irony. 

Kakuzu introduced Hidan to Katasuke, but did not say anything about them being married. He preferred his work life and his personal life private, but Katasuke’s eyes did linger for a few seconds on their matching rings. 

Katasuke explained his intention and Hidan was all up for it. “Oh man, that sounds amazing. I’m kinda into that shit myself… before y’know, I settled down and fucking whatever.”    
“The physical sensations you will feel won’t necessarily mean pain, sometimes their nerves will cancel it out, as you should know,” Katasuke explained. “It would be fantastic if you can be our first human to use it.” 

He showed Hidan the Jashin Pendant, told him the story about Mouse A and Mouse B, and made him write out an agreement form, which he did not read and just scribbled a signature on at the end of the piece of paper. 

“I’ll meet you here tomorrow, same time - we can commence with the operation. It will take approximately five minutes.” 

And with that, Katasuke left. Kakuzu checked the time - 6am. It was time for him to go. He was getting a bad feeling about this.    
“I think its going to be awesome,” said Hidan, zipping up his bag and about to go to his locker to put his things away, “Don’t be such a fucking worrywort, Kakuzu!” 

***

The ‘operation’ was literally less than five minutes - the two templesets were connected with a painless injection with two magnets. These chained up to each other and were revolving around Hidan’s brain using only light. Katasuke showed Kakuzu the MRI scan. 

“As we can see, completely harmless. Will not affect his brain in any way. It doesn’t even merge with it. He will need to be ‘trained’ up in figuring out what pain is what. He did say he likes pain - so he should have not that much of a problem.” 

“I can hear you,” Hidan called from the scanner, muffled. There were a few beeps and the machine pulled him out. “Okay I’m bored. Let’s get on with it.” 

_ Kinda kinky,  _ Kakuzu thought to himself when Hidan walked past him to sit on one of two seats in the room. Kakuzu was old fashioned, and the two sets now inserted in his head - one on the left temple and the other on the neck - reminded him of early 21st century technology, where bluetooth headsets were a thing. Kind of… cyberpunky? Steampunk? Kakuzu didn’t know the word. He was a doctor, not a trendsetter. 

Kakuzu took the seat behind Hidan, while Katasuke got out a knife. He put on the ugly looking hairnet thing which whirled and sparkled a bright purple. 

“Don’t look, Hidan,” Katasuke said, putting two fingers on Kakuzu’s neck, looking for a pulse. “Where do you think I’m touching?” 

“Neck, right hand side.” 

“Good, good,” he then pressed down on the top of Kakuzu’s shoulder. “And now?” 

“Shoulder.” 

Katasuke grabbed Kakuzu’s hand, and without warning, pressed the knife into one of his fingers. A dropped of blood burst instantly from it; and both Kakuzu and Hidan said “Ow!” at the same time. 

Hidan put up his hand, tapping his forefinger with his thumb. “This one.” 

“That’s settled then, the prototype is all good to go. Hidan, you are going to change lives.” 

Kakuzu wasn’t so sure about that. 

***

For the next few months, deaths were an uncommon thing at the hospital. Hidan got a lucrative pay rise (Kakuzu was in charge of their finances, so this was very pleasing for him), which paid off their mortgage and Hidan’s debts. They both previously worked in separate wards; Kakuzu in emergency and Hidan in blood transfusion services. Hidan was then moved across to emergency, and now Kakuzu cold save money on transport as both of them worked together and at the same time. 

A woman suffering cardiac arrest came in, but as symptoms varied for most people, a few others thought otherwise. 

The hairnet was put on, and while Kakuzu was writing on his clipboard, Hidan put his hand on her. He closed his eyes, not even twitching or strained - completely calm. After around twenty seconds, he took his hand away. The woman was wheezing. 

“Right shoulder pain,” he said. “Gallbladder infection.”

He looked at Kakuzu. “Hey,” he said. “Can we take this hair net thing home tonight?” 

Kakuzu narrowed his eyes. “Why? Are you going to put it on your own head?” 

***

The completely opposite - that night when they were going to bed, Hidan yanked the bloody hairnet on him. 

“What the hell are you doing!? It’s past midnight.” 

“Not doing anything,” said Hidan, going up close to him and putting butterfly kisses on his neck. “Just experimenting. To see if pleasure can also be felt.” 

“Well that won’t be fair,” Kakuzu went to take the hairnet off, “For you to feel two things and I can feel…” 

It didn’t really matter anymore, and Kakuzu’s thoughts about having the sanitise the stupid hairnet were in the past. 

Afterwards, Hidan’s face was covered in so much sweat it looked as if he’d been in the shower. “Feeling two people at once,” he gasped, trying to calm his voice down after an hour of rough sex. “Is the best fucking thing in the world.” 

Kakuzu took the hairnet off, and threw it on the floor. “I suppose we can take this thing away from work a bit more.” 

***

The next day was an evening shift, and Kakuzu made sure the hairnet was clean - it was made of little tubes and lights and he felt a little guilty bringing it back to work. He put it in Hidan’s gym bag so there was no evidence of him taking it in. 

They were having little sandwiches Kakuzu made on their break when another nurse came in. “Doctor, the mayor is in and we don’t know what’s wrong!” 

Kakuzu got up and left at once, leaving Hidan with the sandwiches. Hidan stuffed them all in his mouth, chewed and followed after him. 

The mayor had been at a charity event and talking on stage when his face suddenly went purple and started to choke. Now, he was on a bed being wheeled into emergency surgery. Kakuzu put on his gloves, made sure his hair was away from his face, and examined him. After a few moments, he couldn’t figure out what was wrong with him. Instead of bothering to do several tests, he jerked his head in Hidan’s direction. 

“Hidan, put that thing on him.” 

Looking a little bit too enthusiastic, Hidan dumped the hairnet on the mayor and put two fingers on his chest. At once, Hidan nearly collapsed in shock, but another nurse held him up. Gasping, he twitched violently while trying to feel the mayor’s symptoms. 

“If you can’t figure it out, leave him,” said Kakuzu, “We can do our own tests, but they will take longer.” 

“Just one more fucking minute…” the vein in Hidan’s temple was promiment, and the mayor stopped writhing. 

“He seems to be dying,” said Kakuzu, going over to take the hairnet off, but by the time he got there, the machine flatlined and the mayor was not alive anymore. 

Hidan collapsed. 

They checked Hidan’s vitals, and he seemed to be alive, but unconscious. Maybe this was the end? Was this where he would die? Kakuzu didn’t think so. He let the others tend to Hidan while he worked on the mayor. 

After five minutes of laying on the cold hospital floors next to the dead mayor, Hidan gasped; being miraculously brought back to life by some miracle. He was not sure what the hell just went on, but as Kakuzu figured it out later, it was disturbing. 

“When you die,” said Kakuzu to a dreary looking Hidan later, after explaining that the mayor had been poisoned. “Your brain produces massive amounts of dopamine to cope. You know that. Did you see anything when you died?” 

“I saw Lord Jashin.” 

“Jashin is the name of the technology in your stupid little head,” said Kakuzu. “Not a God.” 

He didn’t reply. He turned his back to Kakuzu, to go to sleep. 

***

“Can I have a word?” One of the other doctors came into Kakuzu’s office, where he was typing up a patient’s report to be faxed through to a GP’s office. It was one of the people he got along with at the hospital, Tsunade. Even though she was a money waster, she could have an intelligent conversation for a woman. She put herself in the seat next to Kakuzu without asking. 

“Yes, Tsunade?” 

“I’m just going to get straight to the point,” she said, putting her glasses away in her pocket. “Hidan’s been going from patient to patient with that device of his. We don’t need him for most of them at the moment - we know what’s wrong with them. This is a general injuries unit - rehabilitation - but he won’t leave.” 

“His shift ended an hour ago,” said Kakuzu. “He should have been waiting for me up here then being down in the units.” 

“No offense, Kakuzu, but he’s acting strange.” 

“Stranger than usual, I suppose,” Kakuzu sighed and got up. “I’ll speak to him.” 

They went down the elevator into the wards. The Konoha Ward was full of most military veterans, who were recovering from various infections from the battlefield or broken bones. Hidan was sitting at the very end, hairnet on a soldiers head and looking strange. His eyes were rolling to the back of his head and there was spit around his mouth. Kakuzu figured it out at once. 

Pain had been turned into pleasure. 

He took the hairnet off, and dragged Hidan out, taking him home. 

***

Hidan kept trying to pinch or grab at Kakuzu on the way home. It was though he was drunk - all thoughts had flown out the window. “What the hell, Hidan!?” They parked in the garage, nearly into an old Jesus shrine Kakuzu once threw in there to keep it away from his athiest eyes. “Tsunade had to come and get me because you were literally  _ not leaving people alone _ .” 

“God has shown me the truth.” Hidan said simply, looking up at the wooden cross on the wall. He reached for it, took it off its nails and put it upside down. “There is only pleasure after death.” 

They went inside, Kakuzu going into the kitchen to make some tea. They had a nice kitchen, with an expensive rice cooker sitting on top of the bench. The kettle, however, was not even worth five dollars. “You died,” said Kakuzu. “It’s simple as that.” He paused. “Is there any… any way we could remove those things from you?” 

He nodded at the Jashin Pendant, silver and glowing as always, on Hidan’s neck and temple. 

Hidan looked offended. “I don’t fucking want to get them removed.” 

Kakuzu sat down with his tea, not bothering to make Hidan any. He moved his laptop and papers out the way and put his glasses on to send a text to Katasuke. 

_ Is there any way to get the items removed from Hidan?  _

Hidan peered over his husband’s shoulder. “Don’t you fucking dare.” 

“The fact you are getting off on people  _ while  _ they are unresponsive or unwilling is sexual harassment  _ and  _ creepy.” 

Usually, Hidan would be disgusted, as most people would be. “So?” He said, simply. 

_ He really is out of his mind,  _ Kakuzu thought. His phone buzzed and he looked at the response. 

_ Thank you for enquiring about Yamanaka Technologies. Our company has gone into liquidation. For more information please contact head office.  _

Kakuzu’s heart sank. Immediately, he rang head office to find out any information to find that their phone was disconnected. While Hidan went into the shower, Kakuzu looked into neurosurgery, but it didn’t seem possible to remove it without any prior knowledge of the things in Hidan’s head. 

Googling Yamanaka Technologies, he found that they had only gone into liquidation the week before. He was running out of options. Searching up  _ Katasuke Tono  _ did not come up with anything either. Neither did the word ‘Jashin’ either. 

He didn’t know what to do. 

The loud christian metal music Hidan put on while he was in the shower blared, and there was a clink and Kakuzu heard him swear loudly. It was late now. Kakuzu got changed and into bed. 

“I got a fucking message from head nurse telling me not to come in for a week due to complaints,” said Hidan, toothbrush in mouth. Red foam covered the corners of his mouth - Hidan didn’t exactly have the best teeth. “What the fuck do I do now?” 

“Take time to recover,” said Kakuzu. Hidan went back into the ensuite to spit the toothpaste out. “Get it out of your system.” 

“I can’t get it fucking out,” Hidan flopped into bed next to him, wearing only pants. “It’s… Look, I don’t fucking know. We are two different people. My head is not the same as yours. Good fucking night.” 

He leaned over to kiss his partner deeply. Kakuzu pulled away, looking suspicious. “I taste blood.” 

“Well… I don’t brush my teeth as much as I fucking should.” 

***

A few hours later, Kakuzu went to use the bathroom, he put on the mirror light. He could see blood wiped up hastily on the sink. 

_ What had Hidan done to himself? _

He searched the drawers to find nothing, and the cabinets were untouched. He checked the bin next to the shower to find right at the bottom, a single molar. 

Hidan had pulled a tooth out. 

***

“Be a good man and don’t get into trouble,” Kakuzu poked his head into Hidan’s ‘office’ which consisted of mainly religious books, a large surround system and a flat screen tv where he was playing Grand Theft Auto. 

“Sure.” 

Hidan didn’t even look at him, too busy trying to beat up a prostitute at Muscle Beach. 

Kakuzu had a boring shift, and was fed up by the time he had finished. It was strange not working the same shifts as Hidan anymore. He asked the busy neurologist about potentially getting the Jashin Pendant removed, but she told him she would need the paperwork from Yamanaka Technologies first to understand it first. 

He was at a dead end. 

Knowing Hidan would have not made dinner, it made him even grouchier that he had to go home and deal with him. Usually on his days off he played video games, read, or watch horror movies like the creep he was. 

He found, when he got home, he had done none of that. 

Blood trialed from different areas of the house, staining the carpet that Kakuzu had installed himself, a handprint on the wall, even a few spots splattering the curtain. If it wasn’t for the tooth Kakuzu had found, he would have thought someone came in and murdered Hidan. 

His foot crunched on something and he stepped back and looked down. Squinting, he put the light on and picked up a large toenail. 

He knew it was Hidans, because he painted his nails black once a week. 

Kakuzu went through every room, looking for him. It was in the spare bathroom he found him. The rest of the toenails were on the floor, ripped off with a pair of pliers. Bloody footprints were scattered around the tiles, and there was another tooth in the corner. 

Hidan’s skin on the bottom of his feet had been ripped off, crusting around the corners. A few cuts here and there were up and around his body. He was completely naked, and didn’t even notice Kakuzu come in. There was that sound - a  _ clink -  _ and he pulled another tooth out, blood splattering the mirror. 

Kakuzu knocked the pliers out of his hands, ignoring his protests. 

What was Kakuzu supposed to do? Take him to hospital? He had no idea. Katasuke Tono and Yamanaka Technologies were completely out the option. 

“Tomorrow,” Kakuzu said, throwing him out the bathroom, “We’re getting that thing removed.” 

***

Hidan slept with his back to Kakuzu for the night. It took Kakuzu a long time to get to sleep. His hands still smelled of alcohol wipes. Hidan was covered in stitches and bandages. He kept muttering as Kakuzu patched him up. 

“ _ It’s not enough…. It’s not enough…”  _

Eventually Kakuzu drifted off to sleep, exhausted from worry and tiredness. 

He woke to his alarm, and he banged on the clock hard enough for the batteries to fall out. He wanted to go back to sleep. He rolled over to find Hidan. 

He was not there. 

At first, he thought he had just gotten up to go to the bathroom, but it was evident Hidan was not inside the house - he was usually a very noisy person. In a space of five minutes, Kakuzu got up, threw some clothes on and checked the garage - car was still there - so he went outside. 

It was cold and foggy. Clouds covered the sun rising, and the streetlights were still on. He didn’t know exactly where Hidan had gone. He looked up and down, and started to run in the direction that Hidan jogged occasionally. 

After a few minutes, Kakuzu had no idea where he was. But then on the main road he saw a police car blaring away, which was not common in this area - he followed down the side street. 

There was shouting, and a familiar buzzing sound.

Kakuzu got to Hidan first. He had grabbed someone off the street, put the hairnet on him - he must have gone and stolen during the night when Kakuzu was asleep - he was smiling like mad, like someone finding their prey. Underneath him was clearly a man, screaming and shouting, as Hidan got the drill and was breaking into his skull. 

Brain matter flicked onto Kakuzu’s face, and he was shouting at Hidan to stop. The policemen got out of their cars, also shouting. It all happened in a matter of seconds. 

The man was clearly dead by now, and Hidan’s face was in ecstasy, more than Kakuzu had ever seen him. 

There was a sharp, buzzing sound and what looked like bolts of lighting as one of the policemen lashed out with a taser, rending Hidan unconscious in shock. 

They pulled him away from the dead man, and the last thing Kakuzu saw was Hidan looking at him, smiling, as they put handcuffs on him. His eyes then closed. 

***

_ Beep. Beep. Beep.  _

Kakuzu purchased the cheapest, hideous plastic flowers from the hospital’s gift shop. Full of dust, he shook them out. 

“You going to go see him?” Tsunade was behind him at the checkout. She was holding several lottery tickets. “He hasn’t woken up yet, has he?” 

“...I don’t think he will ever wake up.” 

It had been months since Hidan shocked the local authorities. The taser and the Jashin Pendant had rendered him into a coma, with possible brain damage. It was lucky they took him to the hospital he worked at; where he was in the intensive care ward. 

“Nice flowers, though,” said Tsunade, putting on her glasses to check her numbers. 

Kakuzu sighed. “The nurses told me his bedside was too empty.” 

“Well, it sucks to be here after a shift. Pity they can’t do anything.” She looked at her ticket. “Damn. I lost again.” 

“Well,” said Kakuzu. “That’s your own fault.” 

They parted ways at the second floor, Tsunade still grumbling about her loss. 

Kakuzu used his security card to get into the IC Unit, walking past people dying or crying out with infections. In the back room was Hidan, looking peaceful. Kakuzu put the flowers in a coffee cup he’d left the night before, the stems touching old milk. 

He still had that smile on his face, from when he was tasered all those months ago. But that wasn’t the only thing about him which was strange. 

Hidan still had the biggest erection he’d ever seen from him, poking up the covers. 

“That’s still creepy no matter how many times I’ve seen it…” said Kakuzu, sitting down in his spot. He took a book out his bag. “You’re probably not even listening anymore, you moron.”

He began to read for a while, before kissing his forehead. “I’ll see you at home.” 


End file.
